Rays
by Konoha's Kage
Summary: A collection of oneshots of ranging genres. Mostly Light-centric, mostly LxLight. #10:"Actually, I'm pretty sure YOU were my mid-life crisis."
1. Let Down Your Hair

Mkay, I decided I need to set a goal on FF this summer. I haven't written anything in forever, and I still can't get close to a multi-chapter, COMPLETABLE story. I've come up with a lot of plot bunnies, most of which are Light-centric (because apparently I'm obsessed) and most of THOSE are LxLight. Unfortunately, all those "What if so and so happened...?" questions I ask myself never get answered so I can barely develop a story. So I've decided to write 'em all down as unresolved drabble-type things. My goal is one a week. They're just incomplete, angsty little ficlets, nothing to be tipsy about... but it's better than nothing, and I need to work on my commitment issues. (I heard you're more likely to do things when you write it down. Think that applies to typing?)

Please review and give feedback! I could use all the help I can get from you guys because I really just have no self-discipline. Once a week, just drabbles and I'm still not sure I can pull it off. -_-

**Okay, here's the first one. It's sort of a follow-up to a rape!/tortured!Light fic**. **Any one of the hundreds out there. You've read one, don't lie. I haven't seen something like this yet I've always wondered how it would work out. **

**Pairing: LxLight**

** Warnings: Major angst, post-any traumatized Light fanfic. Mutilation, I guess.**

**(Posted June 19, 2010)**

**Edit: June 25, 2010 - A very small one, in the Author's Note embarrassingly enough. For some reason when I posted this last week, I thought it was 2008. Weird.  
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**Let Down Your Hair**

He'd been called vain and narcissistic many times in his life. Rarely to his face, of course. He was far too respectable to be openly insulted like that. In fact, the only person who ever blatantly insulted his concern for his own physical appearance was L.

But L hadn't been doing that lately. Light couldn't say for sure whether he was relieved or not. On one hand, L omitting one of the very foundations for their fights was a sure sign that things were not normal. On the other, if L brought up how egotistical Light was for obsessing over something so worthless at this point, Light wasn't sure if he could look in a mirror ever again.

And he needed to look into the mirror.

He needed to confront this, to stare at himself and not flinch. To examine himself, reassure himself that it was growing back.

And once it was completely back, things had to be normal. Whole. Everything would be okay.

He could feel a draft. Always there, almost mocking. It was there ever since…

When L found him – after days and days of searching, hacking, searching – in the dark room, all Light wanted to do was hide. He would (try to) scoff at the idea now. Why hide from the man that was saving him?

As it was, thanks to the chains that had held him in place and the lack of anything in that room save a dirty metal basin, L easily saw him. He had not recognized Light at first, bruised in all the wrong places, and a glowing crown of skin where beautiful brunette locks should have been.

The bruises were still there, faded from their once vibrant blotchy purple, but he barely noticed. All he saw, all he felt, was the old razor tickling the back of his neck, sliding against the skin around his ears, over his head, and the soap burning his eyes.

There was a brown fuzz now, evenly distributed. He looked good with an army cut. It was fine. But the sharp, icy feel of metal was still there. A hand, forcing him down. A voice, spiteful, gleeful. And the draft. The cold.

There was an awkward, tense feeling whenever he was reminded of the existence of alternatives. He didn't want to hide, and all he wanted to do was hide. The shame, and then the shame of feeling ashamed. And there was discomfort when his hats looked too big now, and his hoods seemed to reveal more than it shielded.

There was the mirror. The worst thing of all, and the most important. Light needed this mirror to tell him that nothing was there except for him. To remind him that there was light in this room, and all he had to do was open his eyes. And if he could look at himself, then they could as well. Just look. There was no razor, no wetness, no one but him in the light. And slowly but surely, it was growing back.

Whenever L saw him staring a bit too long, he wouldn't say anything except reminding him where he was supposed to be. "Watari is making pancakes for breakfast," he'd mutter if it was morning. Or if it was night, it would be something along the lines of "We had a long day today. Are you tired?"

And each time (not immediately after, sometimes not even within the same day), L would pull him in, catch his lips, would whisper, "You're beautiful."

Part of Light wanted to punch L every time. Ignore what was wrong with what was normal. Replace the cold feeling with superficial heat. Part of him wanted to rest there listening to L's heartbeat, listening to the words and dream of them. Light knew. He always knew. It'd been a long time, however, since he felt it.

He hated that he needed it.

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KK: What's worse than traumatizing Yagami Light? Ruining his hair.

KK: I feel like there's something wrong in this little thing (besides the subject itself) but I don't have much more time and if I don't post it now I don't think I ever will. The Perfectionist in me is telling me not to post it until I really like it, but this is the same Perfectionist that kept me from writing anything real all year. So whatever. I'll probably come back and change it.

I'd really appreciate your feedback!


	2. See Him Die a Little More

KK: Kay-o, here's the second one! Thank you very much to those of you who reviewed, favorited and alerted (especially those who did two of the three!). It was very encouraging and I had fun cranking this one out for ya.

**Pairing: LxLight, KiraxLight  
**

** Warnings: Angst, making a figment of Light's mind into a real character... this is more of a one-shot than just a drabble. It's much longer. Inspired by Rihanna's 'Unfaithful'. Not a song-fic, thank god, because for some reason I hate the way she goes "... A Murderuuuuh."**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or its characters.  
**

**(Posted June 25, 2010)

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**See Him Die a Little More**

The restaurant was dimly lit, filled with the hushed chatter of dignified diners and gentle clinking of silverware and glass.

L Lawliet was not accustomed to this type of socializing, preferring the unguarded conversation he would have with his closest (very few) acquaintances.

But Light chose this place, so L was here.

Not that he knew why. He had not contacted him for a week, up until the invitation. It was brief and impersonal, not something he was used to from the younger male and it piqued the detective's curiosity. This was why L decided to accept when, on any other occasion he would have adamantly refused such a lavish engagement.

Of course, it didn't stop him from barely passing the restaurant's dress code and from skipping the main course altogether for the most sugar-laden item on the dessert section of the menu.

Light took this all in stride, assuring the flustered waiter that the order would be carried out. Again, on any other occasion, L would have been pleased at his date's compliance with his antics. But there was no exasperated comment, not even an annoyed look from Light, and the older man was getting troubled.

For most of the dinner, Light cleverly avoided L's questions, but by the time L neared the end of his elaborate dessert, Light's plate was still full. While the detective certainly hadn't given Light much time to enjoy his meal, it wasn't hard to miss the way Light poked and sifted through his rack of lamb, never bothering to actually eat. In fact, he seemed more inclined towards the glass of red wine accompanying the meal.

Finally, as L's irritation started to become more apparent, Light got to the point.

"After tonight, I won't see you again."

L looked up, his fork impaling a large crumb with a loud clink. "Explain."

"What is there to explain? I don't want to do this anymore. I'm done. It's over."

"I refuse."

Light shrugged, casually sipping his drink. "You don't have a choice."

"I don't believe it's your choice either, Light-kun. Who is making you do this?"

He shook his head. "You're wrong. It's all me. No one's making me do anything, L."

"Fine," L snapped. "If this is all your doing, then it must have your attitude last week that was influenced by someone else, since it's the complete opposite of what you're doing now. Which is the lie, Light-kun?"

The memory of Light's shy but still emotional confession, whispering that he wanted to stay forever with L, that he all he wanted was to escape from the life he had now, was fresh in both their minds.

"Last week, obviously," Light said coolly.

"Light-kun must think I'm more gullible than I actually am."

"For your own good, you should be." The glass was empty of its drink. Light pulled his hand away.

L narrowed his eyes. "Why is that, Light-kun? What is it that you don't want me to see?"

"I just think you should stop looking for things that aren't there." He signaled to the waiter, requesting the check.

"Enlighten me, Light. What exactly isn't here? Because last week –"

"Stop talking about last week!" demanded Light, finally snapping. "Didn't I tell you? That was a lie. All of it."

"_Bullshit_," insisted L, his voice ice-cold. Imperceptibly, Light flinched.

"Look," the brunette murmured, his eyes lowered. "What did you think was going to happen? Did you seriously think this would be some type of fairy tale, where we could just run away together?"

"I wouldn't call it running away," L said. "We'd be flying, actually, on a personal plane. There would be a matter of changing identities, and leaving false trails…"

"And all that will happen," interrupted Light. The waiter came by, dropping the check within its leather casement, and quickly left before Light continued. "For me. Not you. After tonight, any calls you make in order to contact me will be towards a cancelled number. All the paper trails you find will be false." He pulled out a golden slip of plastic, laying it down. "Credit cards, as well, will be impossible to track."

It was said with the emotion one would require to instruct a group of children on a roller coaster. _Keep your hands inside the car at all times. No food or drink is allowed. Please enjoy the ride. _

L almost wanted to laugh. He had been trained to guard all emotion, with his repelling ability to use a gray, dead tone of voice. He wasn't used to this tactic being used on him. "Why?" was all the older man could say.

"I told you –"

"You know that would never stop me. You know what I'm capable of. Why are you even trying?"

"Up until now I've been extremely patient with your invasion of my privacy. However, in the future, I won't hesitate to take immediate action against you." They both knew the threat was real, and it wasn't just a simple matter of a restraining order. For a cold second, L wondered what the percentages were that he could come out those 'actions' alive.

"So he found out?" L asked. At the lack of reply, he said, "Then come with me now. I'll make the arrangements and we can –"

"No!" Light snapped. "I told you I can't! He…"

"He's blackmailing you?" the older man said angrily. "With what?"

The waiter came for the check; Light told him what to take for a tip. L glared at the employee for interrupting.

Light lowered his head, as well as his voice. "It's not… he tried to _kill _himself, L."

His fork rested forgotten on its plate, the crumb broken irreparably. "He's lying," he said simply.

The younger man's face became stony. "You're an _idiot_," he said viciously. "Do you think he was lying when I found him in a pool of blood? He wouldn't answer when I called his name… They had to resuscitate him _twice_ L! In one night!"

A moment of heavy silence, almost tangible.

Fuck, they both thought.

"I can't leave him," muttered Light. "He can't live without me. And I can't live without him."

"That's not true," argued L, feeling cold. "He hurts you, Light."

"He doesn't!" Light denied. "He helped me, L. He _saved _me. Kira made me who I am today."

"And do you like who you are today? Do you enjoy being a criminal?" asked the detective.

Light was completely straight-faced. "It's better than what I would be with you. Which is dead."

"I'd help you. I'd make an exception –"

"Because I'm special?" Light laughed dryly. "How does that make you better than him? You're just as – as selfish!" He clenched his fists. "I'm tired of everyone being so damn selfish."

"Right," L bit out. "Because breaking to law for _you_ makes _me _selfish."

Light stared up at him, his eyes empty. "Just as much as you think Kira was for deciding to kill himself the night I didn't come back to him."

The older male ground his teeth, unable to reply. Instead, he asked, "Why did you bring me here, Light? Do you think I'd be less inclined to fight for you in a public place?"

Light smiled softly. "I don't underestimate you, L. I know you won't stop unless you know how serious I am about this."

The waiter returned, saying he hoped they enjoyed their dinner before leaving them for the last time.

"What do you mean?"

"Two tables over, is a Mr. Taylor, having a nice relaxed dinner with his beautiful wife. Unbeknownst to her, the man owes Kira eighty grand in American dollars in illegal substances."

L's eyes widened, knowing Light didn't expect him to make any arrests tonight.

"We are tired of waiting."

Two tables over, there was the sound of breaking glass, and a man choking. A woman screamed.

Light didn't even turn to watch his handiwork. "His oldest son, who is supposed to handle his father's finances, should be much more willing to work with us," he commented.

Then he stood from the table, where he looked too tall. His chin held too high, his eyes too relaxed.

"It was nice knowing you, L Lawliet." He hadn't turned to walk away yet, but he might as well have been all the way across town, on the roof of the highest building. L couldn't reach him.

Someone shouted for a doctor.

And when Light turned away, slipping flawlessly past the commotion, L swore.

"_I'll kill you, Kira._"

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KK: Reviewing is the currency in this country, yes?


	3. Matsuda

**(Posted July 02, 2010)**

KK: I only got one review for that last one (Dark Miko, you are awesome, I love you and please don't leave me .) which made me pretty sad. That means, I guess, that it wasn't good enough to review, but at least it wasn't bad enough to flame...? After all, the most reviewed fiction on this website had ninety-five percent flames, so that's why I'm being optimistic. (Un)fortunately, I can't hold chapters hostage for reviews (although, if you already don't like it it sort of makes things worse doesn't it?) This is a weekly thing, and really, it is more of an exercise for myself than to see how good I am. However, this being an exercise, I'll say again that any comments you give me on how I can improve would be greatly appreciated.

**That being said**, **I present to you not another LxLight angst piece, but a somewhat light-hearted crack pairing, my first slashy-crack ever. LightxMatsuda! I'm too lazy to title it, by the way, so it will simply be called...**

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**Matsuda**

The park was very empty except for the two of them, as it was that time when any morning joggers went home to prepare for the rest of the day, and everyone else was sluggishly pulling themselves out of bed.

Matsuda stared down at his feet, concentrating on the sound his footsteps made on the sandy concrete. A thousand thoughts were running through his head. Scenarios of his impending doom were becoming disturbingly realistic, as the silence between him and the young man walking next to him wore on.

"So," Light said finally. "You sent me the gifts?"

The older man nodded nervously.

"And the letter," he held up an opened envelope, shaking it lightly, "This was written by you?"

Another nod.

"And if the contents of this letter and the presents I've gotten this past week are anything to go by," Light said slowly, "You have feelings for me?"

"Y-yes," stuttered Matsuda, apparently finding something of interest in his leather dress shoes.

"How long?"

Matsuda blinked. "Oh, um… a while, now." Truthfully, he didn't really know. It certainly seemed a while. He had spent many long nights thinking of the handsome college student, it seemed, though the hours of the week when he was in Light's presence always felt too short.

"I hope it wasn't too much of a while," commented Light. "I've only turned eighteen a month ago."

The detective winced. "Y-yeah, I know." In fact the realization that Light was now an adult was probably what inspired Matsuda to… make his feelings known.

Light looked at him, eyebrow raised. "How long have you been having pedophilic thoughts, Matsuda-san?"

He nearly tripped on air. "What!" Matsuda exclaimed. "I- I mean – it wasn't like…"

The genius decided to take mercy on him by looking away, shifting his book bag to balance on his shoulder before brushing a brown lock out of his eyes. "Although I suppose it doesn't make much of a difference. I came here expecting to find Ryuzaki."

The dark-haired man sputtered. "Ryuzaki?"

He nodded. "He's been trying to find new ways to get me to confess being Kira. Especially now that it's been proven that I'm not."

Matsuda frowned. "That's not right, Light-kun. You should talk to someone about that. I'm sure your father could get him to stop."

Light shrugged. "I don't mind. It's become rather entertaining, to be honest. This was supposed to top the list, next to pretending to be a fifteen-year old girl and chatting with my sister online to find out if I kept a diary," he informed.

'Am I supposed to be flattered?' wondered Matsuda. But he spoke the more pressing thought. "Are you… disappointed?"

"Disappointed?"

"That I'm not… Ryuzaki." At Light's curious look, Matsuda rushed to explain. "It's just that you two interact very well, even though you argue a lot."

Light frowned, and turned his head away. "I don't know…"

Matsuda had never heard Light say that before, with that hint of uncertainty in it. It made his heart thrum with a bit of hope.

"I really do like you, Light-kun!" he blurted out. "And – and even if you don't feel the same way… if you could just let me show you…"

The brown-haired man raised an eyebrow. "Show me?"

If his face wasn't able to get any redder, it was certainly much hotter. "That was stupid, wasn't it? Heh… I mean I've already _told _you so there's not much to sho – gah!"

Matsuda hadn't noticed that Light stopped walking, while the darker-haired man had continued along until he felt long fingers grab his wrist and turn him around.

"No. Show me," Light demanded. "Go ahead."

The look on his face made Matsuda's eyes widen. He recognized it but it had never been directed at him until now. It was always a look reserved for Ryuzaki, or for a particularly interesting find on the computer that had some sort of mystery to be unraveled. Light wanted to challenge, wanted to know.

The look froze Matsuda's frazzled thought processes immediately, replacing it with an instinctive response. He placed a hand over the back of Light's head, pulling him in for a kiss.

How had Ryuzaki been able to resist?

Light's reaction was immediate. He opened his mouth to Matsuda's movement, exploring with almost naïve curiosity the taste of another man's mouth in his own. In a way it was familiar, but there was something different about the kiss compared to the girls he'd kissed. Something less caressing and more…wild. Light had never thought to put Matsuda and wild in the same thought before. He wasn't completely lost though, and ran his tongue over Matsuda's without hesitation, complimenting his advances expertly.

They pulled apart, Light's hair more mussed than intended, and Matsuda's tie inexplicably uneven. A cold wind blew past, touching their lips.

The genius, not surprisingly, was the first to recover. "You truly do act on your emotions, don't you?"

"Huh?"

He shook his head, then reached into his book bag.

"That looks pretty full," Matsuda remarked. "What's in there?"

"Most of it is your gifts," Light replied while rummaging. "I was planning to hit Ryuzaki over the head with them, but I'm afraid you wouldn't be able to afford the loss in brain cells."

Matsuda gaped. Light was… insulting him? After all that? He had never been insulted by the polite boy before!

In fact, the only person Light ever openly insulted was Ryuzaki. Not that the word "openly" was completely appropriate. The banter between the two genii was so advanced that Matsuda could barely follow it, and he could usually only tell that someone was being insulted when the tension in the room would mysteriously multiply.

But, given how close the two were… maybe Light's attack on his intelligence was actually a good sign. He grinned widely, feeling as if something was accomplished, even if he wasn't exactly sure what.

The grin dropped instantly however, when Light emerged with a black notebook and pen. Oh shit. Light was Kira! And he didn't like the kiss apparently, so he was going to kill him bury him in the park and –

"I'm penciling you in for Sunday, seven o' clock."

Matsuda's mouth dropped lower. "S-s…" A date. A date? Well it sounded more like an appointment but…

Light snapped the address book closed and looked up. "I'll see you then, Touta-kun."

A date!

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KK: I expected my first decently written kiss to be between L and Light but apparently that isn't to be...


	4. Noise

**(Posted July 10, 2010)**

KK: My reviews increased my 300 percent! (That is to say, I got four reviews!) I guess I should lay off the angst for a while if that's the reception I get. :) Now, I now reviews aren't everything, but that stuff is just so good. Favorites and alerts for this fic increased, too! You guys are great!

**Now I really have to apologize that this is a day late, and very very short. I haven't had any time on the computer lately and this is what I can get out before I have to leave again. I'm sorry, but it's more humorous (I think) and it's all Light and L interaction, even if it's not a LxLight pairing. I'll work harder on the next one!  
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**Noise**

"Ryuzaki?"

"Yes, Light-kun?"

"Why are you watching me in my sleep?"

"... Would it help Light-kun if I told him I was a vampire?"

"Oh, well in _that _case – NO, you creepy bastard, get the hell away from me!"

Thump.

-.-.-.-

"Would Light-kun like a cup of coffee?"

"No thank you, I don't want to trouble Watari."

"I can assure Light-kun that I can obtain a cup of copy for him without the help of Watari. I am not reliant on him alone."

"In that case, I would love a black cup of coffee."

"Good. Matsuda-san, will you please bring Light-kun and me some coffee?"

Sigh.

-.-.-.-

"Ryuzaki have you ever been to a dentist?"

"I have, Light-kun. It is not an experience I wish to repeat."

"Well if you continue drinking your coffee like that, I'm afraid you will have to again."

"Not if I can help it."

"You won't really be able to help it when your teeth start falling out."

"I'm glad to know Light-kun cares so much, but I believe my teeth are and will remain perfectly intact."

"Considering how you barely make the two-minute mark while brushing your teeth every night and I've yet to see you floss, I find that very hard to believe."

"My teeth are in perfect condition. Would Light-kun like to see?"

"If you get any closer to me with that slush you call coffee, I'll see to it personally that you lose all your teeth."

Slurp.

-.-.-.-

"Has Light-kun finished his report for today?"

"Oh, umm, hold on, Ryuzaki. I'm not used to this type of computer. I have a PC, you know. Right-click, and all."

"Light-kun uses a type of computer more commonly preferred among hackers. Three percent."

"Ryuzaki…!"

"You might find the control key useful in this situation, Light-kun."

"Oh, thanks."

Click.

-.-.-.-

"Ryuzaki, are you in a chatroom?"

"Yes, Light-kun."

"Wait a minute. Isn't that my sister's username?"

"Yes, Light-kun."

"_Why _are you talking to my little sister on the internet… as **Sexy_Elle12**?"

"Light-kun does not need to be alarmed. I am simply getting her to tell me if her brother has a habit of writing furiously in diaries."

"I need to call my mother and ask if she's bought Sayu some pepper spray yet…"

"Ah, she's agreed to meet with me tomorrow – what is Light-kun doing?"

"Disconnecting your internet."

"Light-kun realizes that his chances of being Kira will increase if he attempts to disconnect my internet with a paperweight–"

Crash.

-.-.-.-

"Sorry for punching you in the eye, Ryuzaki."

"That's quite alright, Light-kun. I apologize for kicking your head into the desk."

"It didn't hurt… that much."

"Light-kun seems dazed. How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Do thumbs count?"

"I'm not holding up any thumbs."

"Oh…the other Ryuzaki is, though."

"…Uh oh."

Zzzzz.

-.-.-.-

"How is Light-kun feeling?"

"Heehee. I feel grrrr-eat."

"That's good. You won't be allowed to sleep for a while, though. It's not good when you have a concussion."

"Then Ryuzaki has to keep me awaaaake."

"Yes…"

"Hmmm. Hey, Ryuzaki? If there's a Book of Death… d'ya think death is written in it?"

"If the title is any hint, then I would assume so, Light-kun. Is that a confession?"

"Noooo, silly. It's just… d'ya think there's a Death Eraser? Just in case whoever wrote it screwed up?"

"I doubt it, Light-kun."

"Whyyyy?"

"Because I'm sure whoever wrote the Book of Death used a pen."

"… Oh. Then what about Death White-out?"

"That seems far more realistic."

"Yay. Hey, Ryuzaki?"

"Yes?"

"I hope you get Death Whited-out."

"…Thank you, Light-kun."

…

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KK: Did you know there's a fanbase for the PC and Mac commercials? There are actually some fics for PCxMac! I will never look at my PC's USB ports the same way again. Personally I find it pretty hot, but I swear I'll freak out if Big Carl starts gettin' it on with the Big Mac.


	5. My Big Nose

**(Posted July 16, 2010)**

KK: It. is. too. hot. My keyboard is melting. Or at least that paint that tells you which key is which letter it has is melting.

**Warnings: Definitely OOC!Light. Not as bad as last update (although, in his defense, he did have a concussion at the time). Poetry is a theme here, but no actual poetry, which may or may not seem lame to you. This is an LxLight, but it's all Sayu and Light interaction. **

**Inspiration: ****Inspired by a Malcolm in the Middle episode**** where Malcolm has a genius girlfriend but has to keep it a secret. The genius part, not so much the girlfriend part. Also inspired by an old classical story I read years ago in class called _Cyrano de Bergerac_. If you don't know, it's about a guy who's really witty and smart but he doesn't have any confidence with the chick he loves because he has a really big nose. (What a whiner. Big noses are awesome. Look at One Piece's Usopp!) Hence the title.**

**Edit:**** Just a typo and sentence I thought was rather awkward. Sorry bout that.  
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**My Big Nose**

"LIGHT!"

Light heard his sister's shrieks before he heard the sound of her rapid footsteps pound the stairs.

He was already looking at the door when she slammed it open, looking absolutely livid. "What happened?"

Sayu snarled. "You'd better throw that notebook away," she said, referring to the notebook he was currently filling. "Because I quit!"

Light's eyes widened. "What? Why?"

"I can't take it anymore!" she declared. "I'm not lying anymore. I absolutely refuse to talk to your –"

"Shh-!" he interrupted, walking past her and slamming the door closed. "Do you want Mom to hear you?"

"I don't care. The whole world can hear!" she exclaimed, but her voice lowered nonetheless.

He rolled his eyes, but looked at her expectantly. "What happened?" repeated Light.

Sayu threw herself on Light's bed and pressed his pillow up against her face. "'E_iinsth_mm."

"Sayu, I may be a genius, but I'm not fluent in that particular language."

She threw the pillow at him, missing completely, and pulled herself up, her face no longer full of rage but guilt. "He said he doesn't think Lucy Night is real, and that I'm just pretending that someone else wrote those poems because I'm modest." She paused, then repeated the sentence that was distorted by pillow. "He kissed me."

Light froze for a few seconds. "…Oh."

Lucy Night was a foreign exchange student from America attending Sayu's middle school. She was an aspiring poetess, and had caramel eyes and soft brown hair. She was Sayu's best friend starting a couple of months ago, when she saw Lawliet while walking past his school on the way to hers. Instantly she fell in love and started writing poems dedicated to him. Sayu had found them. She didn't tell Lucy, but decided to copy them down and give them to Lawliet. For the last few weeks, Sayu had been meeting up with Lawliet and delivering poems. The high-school student was absolutely infatuated by the poems, and he never failed to miss a meeting.

Sayu didn't blame him. She wasn't a fan of poetry, but even she could see how incredible the pieces were – well, the pieces that she could read. In addition to English and Japanese, Lucy knew about eight languages and liked to write in them as well. That didn't seem to hinder the quality of the poems however, and seemed to be even more enhanced by the foreign dialect.

Unfortunately, Lawliet was right. Lucy Night wasn't a real person. Sayu had made it up.

But Yagami Light was.

Sayu had given him hell about it when she first discovered the notebook full of verse. After reading the poems inspired by Lawliet, it was Sayu who came up with the plan to pass them on to the British teen. She had promised her brother that the Lawliet wouldn't figure it out and was right.

"Light, I'm sorry. This seemed so fun at first, but I didn't really expect it to go this far."

"I did," he replied quietly. "It's the power of association. He has never seen Lucy Night, but he's seen you, and associates you with the poems. No matter how much you talk about her, eventually, if he never meets her, he won't think of her as real."

Light wasn't modest, as Lawliet believed Sayu to be. He knew his poems were good – better than good. But he also knew who would appreciate them, and see them for what they were.

So far, many of the poems Lawliet has read are old ones, written before Light met him. The rest were all inspired by Lawliet, all in Japanese or English, and of those Light only offered the dark ones. They were written in frustration, confusion, sometimes disgust, and sometimes worry. The subject of the poems was usually a beautiful night creature with silent steps and long fingers that destroyed, manipulated and examined. Other times it was day monster that had reflective, deep eyes, and it hid in shadows or used tricks of light as distraction.

Light had yet to show Lawliet the poems that were written in sadness of unrealized love, or in awe of beauty, or in desperation of another equal, or in fear of rejection and self-destruction.

"This sucks!" Sayu complained. "Why couldn't you fall in love Ryuga Hideki? I wouldn't mind if HE cheated on you with your little sister!"

"He didn't cheat on me," Light corrected. "And it's not your fault, Sayu." He knew that despite her whining, she still felt guilty for what Lawliet had done. "I guess it's over now."

"What?" demanded the girl. "Why don't you tell him the truth?"

Light laughed. "What would I say? 'Hey Lawliet, I think you're super hot. You have pretty eyes and every time I look at you I want to push your hair out of your eyes and kiss you. Yeah, I'm that tennis jock you think has an IQ of fifty. Don't worry, you're not alone, I've manipulated everyone else to think I'm an idiot so I can stay popular, and not a weird nerd like… well, _you_. Actually, I'm a genius and I wrote you all those love poems. Even the one in fluent French. In case you haven't noticed, I'm gay. I'd really appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone that. Also, last week I stuffed your friend Nate in a locker.'"

Sayu frowned. "Why do you hate his friends so much anyway? I talked to the one in stripes and goggles a couple days ago and he wasn't so bad."

"You haven't seen the leather one," Light snapped. "And River is just irritating. He fits way too well in our school lockers."

"Light! You won't get anywhere with Lawliet if you keep bullying like that. You don't need to be mean to be popular."

"No, but I do now ever since Kanami Hisao caught me coming out of the school library a month ago. I only barely convinced him that I was looking for the comic book section."

Sayu didn't know whether to be impressed that Light was able to convince someone that a six-hundred page hardback book on the patterns of the Freudian thought process was a comic book (it didn't even have a picture on the cover!) or to be exasperated by the lack of intelligence within his circle of friends. She chose the latter.

"Light, how can you hang out with people like that? You don't even remember their names!"

"What do you mean?"

"Light, do you remember why Takada broke up with you last year?"

"She broke up with me? I thought we drifted apart."

"You called her Misa! While making out with her!"

"Oh, you're talking about _Takada_. Wait, was Misa the one with the belly button ring?"

"No, Misa's the one with the tattoo on her – The _point _is, at least with L's friends, you remember why you hate them. In fact, you even have emotions towards them! And you can tell them apart."

"I hardly think that calling them 'hermaphrodite', 'bytes-for-brains', and 'albino freak' counts as telling them apart. Besides, what do you mean emotions? I hate them."

"News flash, genius, hate's an emotion. Usually you treat everyone else one of two ways depending on the convenience: You ignore or charm-to-the-point-where-they-become-zombie-like-enough-to-ignore."

"So I prioritize the people in my life."

"No, you really just don't!" Sayu groaned. "Light, you'd rather Kanami Hisao think you're stupid than Lawliet think you're smart. You can't do this anymore! If you don't tell him the truth, then I will," she warned.

"Kanami's a very influential person, Sayu!" Light protested.

"No he's – Light, stop trying to change the subject with me. I'm calling Lawliet."

"Sayu, wait."

She had her hand's thumb poised over the keys of her phone, and the other hand on her hip, and she tapped her foot impatiently.

Light glanced down at the notebook in his hands, at the line he hadn't finished writing. The graphite was as gray as those eyes, staring expectantly up at him, waiting for him to reveal the words he still had.

"Just… give me some time to think about it, okay?"

His sister sighed, reluctantly putting her cell phone away. "You don't have much time, Light. Lucy Night isn't here to protect you anymore, but you've never needed her."

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KK: I had no idea how to end this. I hope it didn't seem weird to you guys. Thanks for reading!


	6. Unconditional

**(Posted July 23, 2010)**

KK: Thank you all for the support! This is my most alerted story (probably 'cause it's the one with more than one chapter -_-)! Y'know, I never actually paid much attention to the stats other than reviews, until I finally decided to make use of that email alert system ffnet so kindly gives to us.

** Warnings: Aaand, we're back to the angst. Hope you all don't mind. Not LxLight. Doesn't even have the potentiality of being LxLight. (Well, it does have the possibility, but let's just say that'd make a very awkward story.) It is L AND Light, though. ****CaliforniaHills7, looks like your request came true (really just at perfect timing), kind of. I doubt it was what you were expecting, but, as always, I hope you guys can enjoy it.**

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**Unconditional**

The only sound was the muted rumbling of L's high-quality tires on concrete. It had been quite a bit of time since L felt the silence this deeply. Light hadn't made a sound, which made the L uncomfortable.

While it was true that the boy didn't actually have a noisy personality, there had always been a sort of tuneful, curious, peaceful loudness surrounding him, as it did with every other happy child his age. This, combined with the clever, powerful yet pure atmosphere he kept was what made Yagami Light such an individual.

L had become accustomed that type of presence and was sorely missing it.

"Light," he said, taking great effort to break the oppressive silence. "How do you feel?"

The boy's wide, childish eyes blinked, and his lips parted slightly, but he only took in a bit of breath and tipped his head forwards. L lost his courage to persist.

Ten minutes later, they pulled into the driveway to L's house – where Light had been staying this month.

"We're home." Immediately he regretted it when he saw Light look up towards the large, flawless building, and wince ever so faintly. No, this wasn't Light's home. It may have been yesterday night, when he had fallen asleep to L's soft voice with a flutter of a smile on his lips.

But no. No home. There couldn't be.

"Sayu. We forgot her."

Sayu. She was a sweet girl, even after the accident. Unlike Light, the three-year-old had fallen in love with L instantly, insisting that he was Ryu the Raccoon from some children's cartoon she loved. They had been planning to visit her – Light had chosen the fairy tale he was going to read to her while she recovered. But they forgot.

"You aren't in any condition to see her."

"I'm not sick."

"Light, you don't want to see her."

"…"

The boy unbuckled his seatbelt and climbed out of the car, his brightly colored sneakers stumbling over the cement.

L followed, leading the boy into the house where they both removed their shoes (L kicked them off towards directions unknown, Light set them aside neatly).

They headed for the kitchen, where L rummaged through the fridge for the peanut butter and jelly, all the while keeping his eye on Light, who had climbed onto a stool, his feet dangling lifelessly above the pearly tiles.

L plopped a bag of white bread on the kitchen island, where Light stared unseeingly at the marble surface. Taking two slices out, the man spread the peanut butter on one and slopped a huge and unnecessary amount of jelly on the other. Light made no comment.

He used on finger to push the food in front of Light. "Here."

"I'm not hungry."

"I know," L said simply. "Eat."

Light didn't even sigh before he gripped the edges of the sandwich with both hands and ate, not tasting the overly sweet preserved strawberries or the viscous peanut butter.

L still watched, half-calculating, half-struggling. These past weeks, L had found himself by Light's side far more often than expected he could ever be for anyone. He's comforted Light when the boy found himself lonely of his sister and mother, and he's calmed the boy after nightmares of what happened and what could happened.

The man had calculated percentages of something like this happening, and though the percentages had been high, he had not been able to figure out what he would do. He never even considered that he would have to do something, but here he was, the only one who could help and completely helpless.

All L knew was what he wanted, and that he wasn't sure, for the first time in a long time, if he could take it.

"Light," he began slowly. "The only thing I can do now is ask you to remember that I have been in the same position as you."

Light stopped chewing, and stared intently at L.

He continued. "Though it was a long time ago, I was never able to forget it. I know you won't either. Your mother dying today will stay with you forever, but know that I am here and that you can say anything to me."

The seven-year-old boy lowered his head, his short locks falling over his eyes. A moment's silence, then "You're wrong."

"Light?"

"You think you're the same as me, but you're wrong."

L saw the boy's eyes then, and recognized the primal, desperate gleam from the first day they met. It aimed to hurt, to either repel or cause need for vengeance, L was never sure. He hadn't really been affected by this defense mechanism the last time it happened, but it had only happened once and this time it was sharper and more dangerous. Or maybe, because L had become so closer to this boy, he simply felt more vulnerable. He tried to brace himself for the assault, but wondered if it made any difference when Light spoke.

"My parents _wanted _me," Light declared.

L's brain went off on several tangents. That was surprisingly painful. His mind shot back to the day when L had willingly told Light about his past, and watched as the story was absorbed into the seven-year-old mind with caution, care, and compassion.

The first stage had been denial, probably there at the hospital when all the machines went off and the doctors and nurses scattered futilely. God knows Light had plenty of time to deny as they had spent hours there while his mother teetered on the edge of death before finally falling over.

This was probably anger, the second stage, but it may have been the beginnings of bargaining as well.

Because Light was wrong.

After all, only _one _of his parents wanted him. L thought of Soichiro, the man so consumed in his work that he had already left his family before his body did.

L was already half-provoked to point this out to Light, but he stopped himself just before realizing that the boy had already realized the fallacy in his statement and his face was already contorted in the pain.

"Light."

The boy startled, then made a strangled, fearful sound before abandoning the stool. At least, he attempted to. He was still too small to get off the stool easily and in his haste, fell gracelessly onto the cold floor.

L was already in front of the boy, lifting him up. "Where does it hurt?" He was already calculating the amount of time it would take for him to get the first aid kit, obtain a band-aid, and put it on. Before Light, he had barely even known what antiseptic was. Now he knew that the first aid kit was on the first cabinet next to the sink behind the canned beans, and that the rocketship-themed band-aids cheered Light up the most.

Light protested, trying to fumble his way out of L's grasp, but the man held firm. "Stop, I…"

"Answer me, Light. Where does it hurt?"

Light shook his head. "No! It doesn't…"

They both fell silent, staring at the reddening skin of Light's skin which would eventually purple, then green, then return to a soft tan.

L wondered when Light had started shaking violently, or when he had turned to bury himself in L's arms, when L had responded by hugging the child closer, or when L's shirt started to soak through.

"I- I don't kn-know wh-where…"

L pulled the boy tighter, a feeling of protectiveness and want that he had never imagined feeling before. He wanted Light. He wanted to watch Light grow and smile, and he wanted to be there when Light hurt, but he wanted even more to keep Light from getting hurt.

He wanted to be there every time Light tried to convince himself that he should have been in that car with his mother and sister, and he wanted to be there when little Sayu recovered and Light could begin to be happy again.

"L…!"

So as Light's keening sobs tore horrid wounds into the air, L whispered sweet everythings, his words slowly, clumsily, determinedly stitching everything up together again.

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KK: Cliche metaphors are cliche metaphors. Run on sentences are also run on sentences. "Everythings" is apparently not, in fact, a word, but "nothings" is. So unfair.


	7. Wear Short Skirts

**(Posted July 31, 2010)**

KK: It's a little late, sorry. This was a rather hard one to grind out, but the end was easy. Mostly this just needed some revision.

**Pairing: LxLight, one-sided BxL (Thanks to JohnMicky for pointing out that I wrote BxLight on accident. My bad! ^_^)  
**

** Warnings: Another High school AU, OOC!L to the max, cheesy ending, and use of Taylor Swift's "You Belong With Me" in a not-so-positive light. I suggest you look up the lyrics or youtube it if you haven't heard the song. (And if you've turned on the radio at all this last year, I doubt you haven't.)  
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**Disclaimer: Death Note is owned by Ohba and Obata, neither of whom are me or myself. I also do not own Taylor Swift's song. Also, I'd like to say here that I have nothing against most of her songs. I will not hesitate to sing off-key, "Have you ever thought maybeeee..." not matter how much it is overplayed and overrated. It's catchy... . but my cynical side just could not deny the creepy dark side to this song, so I just had to address it here.**

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**Wear Short Skirts**

L climbed up his stairs to his empty bedroom, and groaned. Because about five minutes ago, this bedroom wasn't empty.

He threw a furious glare out his window, which looked directly into his next door neighbor's bedroom, where B (for Bane of L's Existence) was grinning happily back at him. The red-eyed teen then turned on his stereo full blast, restarting the cursed song that L had just gone over to his house to destroy.

L snatched up his cell phone, and nearly broke the speed dial button that was set to his boyfriend's phone.

He called twice, thrice, before Light picked up.

"L."

"Come back," L demanded.

"Sorry L, I just remembered I have to get to the tennis court early tomorrow. Maybe later."

"That was the worst excuse I've ever heard come out of your mouth!" L snapped. "I got B to leave us alone…"

"That's fine," muttered the voice on the other end. "I'll tell you when I'm free."

"Light, it's just a song. A set of meaningless rhymes compiled by some lovesick teenage American girl set to some guitar chords."

"I know what a song is, L."

"Then why is Light-kun being so insecure?"

Indignant huff. "I'm _not _being insecure!"

"I disagree. While the fact that Light-kun is identifying himself with a figurative cheerleader with a narrow-minded personality is in some aspects rather accurate –"

"L Lawliet, shut the hell up!" The static click of Light hanging up was somehow louder than his words.

L stared down at the digital screen that read 'call ended' miserably.

Meanwhile, through the wide-open window of the house next to him, the neighborhood stalker was singing very loudly, and very off-key, to that devil's song. "She doesn't… get your humor like I do…"

-.-.-

"Light, are you going to talk to me?"

"What are we doing right now?" Light replied. _Crack._

"Right now we're exchanging meaningless small talk while you attempt to pummel me with tennis balls."

"Don't be ridiculous. As captain of the tennis team," Light said in between the sharp sounds of racquet against ball against concrete. "I need to practice, don't I? Do you want me to philosophize with you while we're both sweating and dirty?"

"I actually want to do something _else _sweaty and dirty with you but you haven't given me a chance since last Tuesday!"

"I've been busy." _Crack!_

"You've been avoiding – Light, calm down!"

_Fwump_ – the tennis ball hit the net, and bounced pitifully away.

Light brushed back a damp lock of hair. His face was shining from exertion, but his lips locked into a grim line. "Fine. What is it?"

L stared at Light across the net, unable to see if Light was staring back, but he doubted it. "You're upset because of B."

There was no denial, affirmation, or excuse. Rather Light raised his eyebrow, in a way of saying 'And? What'll you do?'

This was far from the first argument they'd ever had, but it was certainly the first of its kind. L was barely getting used to apologizing to Light, and actually having to mean it. L thought it ironic that he actually had to boost Light's ego this time – and wanted to do it.

"B is wrong. For all his intelligence, he thinks he knows what's best for me. But he doesn't know me."

"And I do?" Light scowled. "I'm sure you've noticed what a private person you are. The fact is, L, I wasn't here first. B knows your story more than I ever could."

"You've given up already?" L asked quietly.

When they had first met, Light and L had already known how different they were. Worn out jeans with freshly-pressed shirts. They also knew the game that had developed the moment they locked eyes. Up until then they had never been interested in the other side.

When had Light decided he didn't want to play anymore? It was B who invented the games and forced L to play. It was supposed to be Light who actually wanted to play with him.

The brunet shook his head, turning away. "I just know what the odds are here."

When did Light start thinking 'Hey, why isn't this easy?'

-.-.-

"Stay away from him."

B beamed up at L from his seat. "Lawli, you're here! Strawberry jam?"

L grimaced down at the obsessive stalker. "I mean it, Beyond. No matter what you do, I'm staying with Light."

Red eyes narrowed. "Even if you say that… he won't last." His tongue flickered threateningly over a smudge jam on the palm of his hand, but L wasn't fazed.

"He's standing out there on the field." L lowered himself towards B. "Not hiding in the bleachers."

-.-.-

Light's head was pressed between the hard door and L's soft lips.

"L," he gasped when agile hands traveled under his thin shirt. "Stop."

He hadn't actually expected L to comply, but he did, albeit with an incredulous and petulant glare. They were back in the older teen's bedroom. Light glanced furtively at the window, but L caught it.

"B isn't home," L assured, his voice laced with an exasperation that was only detectable by a select few. "And since I doubt you want him to join us…"

Light rolled his eyes. "It's just – maybe this isn't right –"

"Light!" L interrupted firmly, prying Light's hands from the doorknob. "Look at me."

It took some time for Light's eyes to meet his, time that could have been spent doing something else if it hadn't been for that damned song.

"B knows things about me. He knows what I like and what my dreams are." He held the smooth hands tighter. "Before this became a contest with B, you were content with figuring out my story on your own. You hate the things I like – but you love me anyway. And my dreams – my dreams are you, Light. We're different – but that's never been the problem! Stop looking at us like we're an unlikely match, or at the odds of us staying together! We just belong together. It works. I belong with you."

By the end of that speech, a soft blush lit Light's face, and he chuckled. "Y'know, L Lawliet, keep grinning like that, you'd light up the whole town."

L nuzzled his boyfriend's neck, finally feeling the muscles relax. "Too bad for the town because I only want the one I love to see my smile."

He could feel the skin of warm up instantly. "L…"

"Y'know…" L murmured into Light's ear. "That American song caused a lot of trouble. But I bet it could redeem itself."

"Mmm, how's that," Light asked while preparing to slide the white sweater off of L.

"She wears short skirts…" L sang softly.

Light growled roughly, pushing L onto the bed. "Shut up before you ruin the mood."

"What about the high he– mmph!"

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KK: B = Taylor Swift. Obviously. When was the last time you've seen someone in high school wear actual short skirts anyway?

**EDIT: I forgot to add, I won't be here next week and I doubt I'lll have access to the internet since I'm going on vacation. Expect something somewhere between August 10 to August 12, though. See you then!**


	8. Treasure

**(Posted August 12, 2010)**

KK: So I just got back from Oregon, yall's. Residents of Oregon, you are all so. freakin. cool. No sales tax AND people pump your gas for you! Wtf, yo? Yeah, I don't get out of California enough, you can probably tell. But I still think Oregon's fudgin' awesome. I nearly cried when we crossed the Cali border again and gas shot up thirty cents and my Starbucks' Mocha frappuchino was no longer four dollars.

Also, I got back at two in the morning on August 10, which is also my birthday. Which means I'm sixteen and one step closer towards college and the illusion of being independent from my parents. :P Just thought I flaunt my bday out there for those of you who need something to read.

**You can say this is either a really late update or a slightly early one. I apologize if it's the former, and the latter as well since it's a pretty lame attempt at making the cup seem half full. Anyway, you can blame One Piece for this mess.****  
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**Treasure**

They both knew the captain was awake, but nothing was said to acknowledge the fact. Instead, the captain watched quietly as the other man crept from the bed, his dark figure examined intently as he slipped on the now-dirty linen shirt.

A few barely audible steps; the door opened and closed. It was the only sign that the creature in the captain's cabin that night was not a ghost or a dream.

Captain Light already knew that within ten minutes, Ryuk would ring the bell signaling the beginning of the day for the crew.

No one would be the wiser that the man they'd discovered in the sea had spent the night (and the nights prior) in the captain's bed, for they would see Ryuzaki climbing out of one of the thin beds provided for the crew, no differently from the rest of them.

The captain wondered that he had become so used to their routine in just little more than a week, but decided it wouldn't matter. If all went as to be expected, this would be the last day the Ryuzaki walked aboard this ship, the _New World._

-.-.-

While the rest of the pirates ate, Ryuzaki stood apart from them. He leaned against the railing, and watched the ocean for something or someone. The captain watched the stowaway from afar, appreciating the way the sea's wind blew against the inky hair and the snowy shirt that would have otherwise hung in the lifeless way that kept the other pirates uninterested and away.

But Light was happy that they did not pay attention to him, since he wanted to keep it all to himself. Whether it was arrogance or plain fact, Light knew that his crew could never appreciate the man who called himself Ryuzaki for the masterpiece that he was.

Misa and Mikami could not understand why their captain had decided to bring aboard the ghastly stranger who looked more frail than the storm-torn lifeboat. Matsuda saw Ryuzaki as a child sees the monster under his bed – with an excessive amount of fear of the inhuman abilities that the monster might have. Ryuk saw him as entertaining as an audience viewing a particularly talented dancer that would be forgotten once night fell.

Light saw an equal and a polar opposite. A perfectly fitting puzzle piece from a very different puzzle.

A treasure coveted, never obtained.

The young captain passed a hand over his face, resisting the urge to claw at himself. The traveling bard from the last town must have left a more lasting impression on him than he thought.

"Land ho!" cried Matsuda eagerly from the crow's nest.

Ryuzaki looked up immediately, and Light hurriedly turned away, preparing orders to ready the ship to dock.

-.-.-

Yotsuba Island, being the only sign of civilization in months of travel, was a pirate's island. Any pirate that tried to cause too much trouble here would usually be set right by another of his kind, since this town's resources were too invaluable to be selfishly raided. Needless to say, the townspeople prospered quite happily.

Peaceful was hardly a description of the town, however, since the nights were forever alight with rambunctious taverns, with the scent of alcohol and sweat permeating the air.

The Kira pirates were eager to reach Yotsuba, and Light sent them off with a barely heeded warning to not cause too much trouble before they set off to the nearest tavern to reap the rewards for their efforts.

He overheard Matsuda chattering rapidly, "Hey guys! While we were docking, I thought I saw the Whammy pirates' ship!"

"Is that so?" exclaimed Misa. "What could they be doing here?"

The Whammy pirates were composed of the strongest rogues of the sea. Rarely were their acts of piracy ever heard, but everything they did had a monumental effect. Two years ago, it was said that the body of the mayor of Kanto was discovered hanging from an oak tree under the Whammy's Jolly Roger. It wasn't until three months after his death that the townspeople realized that said mayor had been stealing money from the town's treasury and spending it in the local whorehouses.

"Exciting, isn't it?" a soft voice commented. "What could the Whammy pirates be doing here?"

Light looked sideways at the man who called himself Ryuzaki. "Maybe they've lost something at sea and are looking for it here."

Pale lips twitched. "What an interesting idea."

-.-.-

Light made his way to the innermost tavern, which his crew would be too impatient to search out, and where he could finally give in to the temptations of the spirits without running the risk sending the _New World _to its doom.

It was actually a tavern/inn, and was crowded with men who had long since abandoned any decorum they might have had at the door.

He chose a table in the farthest corner from the door, and ordered a large glass of rum from the voluptuous waitress who tended to the tables, giving her a boyish grin to ensure his orders' quality.

He must have had around three mugs of the powerful liquor, which may have explained how he had not noticed, even with his seat facing the door, when Ryuzaki entered the tavern.

The reason for his inebriation slid into the seat beside the captain. "Does your crew see you in this state often?"

Light's speech was surprisingly coherent, though the fact that he was feeling the temperature raise rapidly may have made up for it. "They rarely have the chance."

"You are not very close to the men you allow into your life as a pirate, are you, Captain?"

The young pirate scowled. "And I suppose you're any better with your crew?"

Ryuzaki's miniscule smile somehow made Light's vision even more blurry. "My men are like my family."

"Really." Light's eyes narrowed. "Tell me, why would a captain, who considers his crew family, abandon them at sea, and willingly put his life in the hands of another group of pirates and strangers?"

The deep grey eyes did not falter. "Some of us need the excitement a storm brings once in a while."

There was that half-second of connection again, and then the overwhelming feeling of distance returned, like the snap of a rubber band. Light took a large swig of the drink in his hand.

"And if the storm renders you lost at sea indefinitely?"

Ryuzaki was never an uncertain man. "They would find me."

As if right on cue, the tavern door flew open, allowing light to flood the dimly lit room. Two young pirates stood in the entrance. The shorter one was far paler than most seamen, with snowy blonde hair and large eyes. The taller one had skin-tight leggings and a black leather vest, and was actually a woman – at least that was what Light thought until the scantily clad pirate spoke up, revealing a harsh, rough and definitely male voice.

"Oi, listen up! We're looking for our captain. Looks like this guy," – a sharp gesture towards the pale pirate – "except taller, with black hair, and not as freaky. Anyone seen 'im?"

Light felt a strange victory at the lack of reaction from the crowd, especially from Ryuzaki. The two pirates left, and Light commented, "He does look quite a bit like you. Any blood relation?"

"None, not that I would tell you either way."

"Of course. Why didn't you answer?"

Ryuzaki put a thumb to his lips, and Light avoided looking at the gesture to listen intently to the man's words.

"I know my crew well, Captain Light. I trust that while they will not rest in their search for me, they do not expect to find me until at least two nights from now."

That was all Light needed to know before he called the waitress and requested a room for two for the next two nights.

"We only have single beds left, sir."

"That's perfect."

-.-.-

A pirate's life was all about romance, but never about love.

Two captains could be friends, but could never trust each other. They could be two halves, but never a whole.

But a pirate and his treasure were forever.

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KK: You might be able to tell, but I know NOTHING about pirates, so I pretty much dumped 'em on land as soon as possible.

Also, a good portion of this was written while listening to Hercules' "I won't say I'm in love". Damned if I know why.


	9. Blooper

**(August 20, 2010)**

**Attention: This is not a real update - or at least not a full one. This was something I wrote due to stress and the actual one-shot I was planning to write is not coming along as I had hoped. This little monster is completely random and weird and involves a pairing that I'm pretty sure you all will kill me for.**

**Warning: Seriously. Evil pairing.  
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**Which is why I deeply apologize and am increasing my security system until I can get the next update out, which if I'm lucky will be tomorrow. So... uh... I'm just... sorry. Because this is so weird.  
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**Blooper**

It was a duet between the two singers, Amane Misa and Ryuga Hideki. They were proclaiming their love for each other in C minor and giving each other goo-goo eyes. By the end of the music video Light was frowning.

He flipped the television off, and crossed his arms as he leaned back on the pillows.

"Why are you watching it if it makes you jealous?"

Light turned to look at the love of his life, who had just been on the digital screen singing the overplayed pop song. There was a slight creaking of the bed as another person added to the weight. "Why would it make me jealous? It's just for publicity's sake, right? After all, it'd be a scandal if you were seen with me."

A roll of the eyes. "Yeah, so why is Light-kun being so pouty?"

"I'm not being pouty."

Artificially blonde hair – only lightly dried from the shower they had both shared – smelled of rosy shampoo as it crept under Light's nose in their embrace. "Yes, Light-kun is! And you're jealous!" It was said with obvious delight.

Light pulled his lover's body closer. "Okay, so I'm a little jealous," he admitted grudgingly.

An affectionate kiss. "Well, don't be! At least I wrote the song for Light-kun."

Light rolled his eyes this time. "It's called 'My Moonlight.' I've already got a love song from a girl in grade school with that title."

"Well, grade school slut won't be getting her song on the Tokyo hit songs list next week," was the catty reply.

With a laugh, Light gave in. "Alright, you're right. It is a beautiful song," he said honestly. "Thank you for writing it for me."

"You're welcome. Now we've gotta get up, I have a scene to shoot today. Don't worry – I won't have any love scenes with Misa today."

Light sighed, allowing the warmth of his boyfriend to leave his arms.

"And," Hideki said with an impish grin. "When we get to the dance shoot, I'll get a personal recording of it just for Light-kun."

* * *

KK: So... would you define this as LightxOC or Crack? Actually what's worse, LightxOC or this thing? Actually this was inspired by my brother asking me while browsing youtube "Hey, have you seen this singer? He's like the Korean Chris Brown!" (Pre-domestic abuse charges.)

Well, remember this is not a real update. The actual thing is on it's way! If I can get it right...


	10. Anew

**(Posted August 21, 2010)**

KK: You know when school is starting soon when I slip back into procrastination mode - it really should be the other way around but it isn't...Well I should probably let you know that the next one will be the last one (Ignores the crowd of people who are sighing in relief.), because I'm starting school next week. After this I'm determined to actually come up with a real plot. Maybe. Okay not so determined. Let's say it's one of those New Year's Resolutions. .

**So this one is extra long, to my surprise. There's just something that didn't satisfy me about this one, so I kept writing. (I know, it's supposed to be quality over quantity, I'm sorry!) It's an Alternate Universe, Sci-fi. It's a little odd and Matt and Sayu are in here because you can basically give them any personality and they won't be OOC. :P**

**This one was inspired by quite a few things: Red vs Blue's last two seasons, the MacxPC fandom, Eagle Eye, other lame movies where robots are out to destroy the world... you know. It's also a bit of a nod towards ****Eve, ****Robo, Tio , KOS-MOS, and other old rpg ****robotic ****stereotypes. Hats off to you if you catch what games those guys came from... I'm a nerd.  
**

**

* * *

Anew**

He followed her as she moved swiftly through the halls. She didn't say anything, but her stony expression and rigid posture spoke volumes. She was putting something dear to her at risk by allowing him here, he knew.

They stopped at the very end of the hall, and the head of Yagami Corp. turned around abruptly, fixing him with her stern brown eyes. "Look. I don't trust you. I don't think I have to remind you of our security system, but it can't hurt to remember that I can and will make your life a living hell if you so much as glance at any of the information in this room suspiciously."

He smiled amusedly around his cigarette, and lifted up his goggles to look her full on in her brown eyes. "I'm all yours, ma'am."

She pursed her lips but said nothing as she turned to the mechanism by the door and slid a plastic card through the slot. She leaned forward, allowing the system to scan her retina, and spoke clearly her name for the voice identification. "Sayu Yagami."

The green letters "ACCESS GRANTED" flashed on the small LCD screen, and the large doors slid open with a hiss.

The room was dimly lit with small blinking lights. There were no windows and no other doors but the one they entered in. Instead, hundreds and hundreds of screens lined up against each other on all four walls, lines of numerical figures streaming down them at high-speed. He could hear the faint humming of the machine at work, activating in response to their presence.

A smooth voice suddenly surrounded them, mechanical and toneless enough but bearing an uncanny resemblance to a human's. **"Good evening, Director. The time is 2244 hours. The date is August 20****th**** of 3059. We are LIGHT. We see that you have one unregistered human accompanying you. Please either affirm this or, if this situation is unfavorable, activate the troubleshooter."**

"Good evening, LIGHT," Sayu replied warmly. "This is Matt Jeevas, no surname. He is trustworthy until I say otherwise."

"**Noted. Adding Matt Jeevas to: LIGHT/Yagami Corp/Personnel Files/Temp. Date of file creation, August 20****th****, 3059, at 2245 hours."**

"Thank you, LIGHT."

"**You are welcome, Director. Shall we begin an in-depth analysis of Matt?"**

"That won't be necessary for now, LIGHT," Sayu said hurriedly. No need for the program to know that Matt was a representative of Whammy Corp. LIGHT's infection had already caused him to calculate the company's threat to society at 89%.

"**An analysis is recommended in order to ensure the safety of the corporation."**

"Later, LIGHT," she said placatingly, although logically her tone would not have really registered with the program. "Right now, Matt is going to be uploading a new feature to your hard drive. We think it will increase your efficiency greatly."

"**Efficiency is currently at 95.98%,"** LIGHT protested emotionlessly.

"Well, what's wrong with increasing that?"

"**Such a claim made by a newcomer has a 78.795% probability of being a trap. To alter that calculation we strongly recommend an analysis of Matt Jeevas."**

"It's fine," Sayu said, this time more forcefully. She caught Matt's eye, and he immediately slid the backpack he had from his shoulder, pulling out an external driver.

"So LIGHT," the redhead said conversationally as he started inserting wires into the computer. "I thought you might use a friend."

"**As an artificial intelligence and logistics program, we are in no need of 'friends',"** LIGHT informed.

"Nonsense," Matt said cheerfully. "In times like these, everyone needs friends."

"**Since we have no human emotional thought processes, it is not in our coding to require the emotional stability that is given through friends. Regardless, we may access our data on psychology in order to maintain compatibility Mail Jeevas' 'friend' program. Our data is very thorough."**

"I'm sure it is," Matt said, in slight amusement. "In fact, for a computer, I bet you understand humans more than most of my friends. Hey, why don't you grab that data for me? You're right,

it'd probably help."

Sayu watched closely as Matt's program installed itself, wondering if Matt really thought he could distract LIGHT like this. The brightly clad computer genius caught her worried look, and winked at her. "LIGHT, I'd like you to meet… L." The lines of text flowing down Matt's stopped abruptly, leaving a blinking bar at the end of the words '100% INSTALLED.'

There was a moment as the computer registered the new program, and Sayu couldn't help holding her breath. Her heart fell when LIGHT said in a voice that, if he were human, would have been venomous. **"There is a 97.63 % probability that L is a threat to us. Initiating extermination of L."**

"Damnit," Matt muttered, grimacing. His hands, which had been typing casually before, were suddenly flying, and keys barely able to keep up with his commands.

"Do not exterminate, LIGHT!" Sayu commanded. "That's an order!" To Matt she said, "What do we do now?"

"The virus's aliasing itself within LIGHT's attributes. L's barely catching up with it. He's trying to bypass LIGHT's extermination processes."

"LIGHT, I gave you a direct order to not exterminate the program!"

"**The director's order may be overruled if there is a probability of 75% or more that he or she is unable to commandeer us in a responsible manner. Through an emergency voice analysis, we have concluded that Matt Jeevas is truly Mail Jeevas, third officer of the Whammy Corporation, which is a direct threat to our functionality. That you, director, have allowed such a hazard into the Yagami Corporation's building increases the probability of your incompetence to 87%, which is more than enough for us to overrule you."**

"The virus is messing with the calculations," Matt told Sayu. "I'm getting L to work on that right now."

Sayu cursed. This was all because of the Shinigami, a terrorist group from Mu.

Seigi had been at war with Mu for the past thirteen years, with Yagami Corp. as Seigi's main artillery and communications source.

LIGHT was Yagami Corp.'s greatest creation. He was an artificial intelligence was designed to match the abilities of the world's most intelligent detectives and judges, as well as tactical soldiers and agents. He was programmed to administer justice to the greatest of its extent, with the death penalty as a last resort.

However, somehow the Shinigami were able to insert a virus into LIGHT, called KIRA. It had moved 'Death' far up the AI's list. If they didn't stop him soon, LIGHT would attempt to eliminate every criminal, from the petty robber to serial killer, by killing them.

He could. He had access to all the recording devices in Seigi, and her allies. He could make electronic devices act on his command. _No – he wouldn't just attempt,_ Sayu thought in despair. _He can and he will if this doesn't work_. _And Mu would conquer this ruined country._

"What can I do?"

Matt didn't turn to look at her. "Make yourself credible. Try and lower that percentage on you."

Sayu thought furiously. "LIGHT, I'm perfectly capable to be your commander. I know your coding more than anyone on this earth!"

"**This is true. The only other person who can fully comprehend our scripts is Yagami Light, our creator, who died in the Yotsuba Battles on January 28, 3052. It is this very fact that had increased the probability of your incompetency to 67.83%."**

"Why?" she demanded.

"**Upon Yagami Light's death, instead of turning to your acquaintances for the emotional comfort humans require to fulfill their image of loss and emptiness, you turned to us in the hopes of reviving your brother through us. We allowed this for a time, since causing your to grieve more would have raised your incompetency to 73.934%.**

"**However, your obsession with humanizing us became an obstacle to our efficiency when, after the upgrade to our logistics processes, you ordered us to cancel the death of Lind L. Taylor."**

"That wasn't an upgrade," Sayu snarled. "That was KIRA. And Lind L. Taylor had not been proven guilty in the court of law!"

"What the hell? What is he doing?" Matt muttered suddenly.

"What is it?" the director asked. "What's your program doing?"

"L's not going after Kira. He's rummaging through Light's scripts, but ignoring the foreign codes. Why?"

"It's your AI, don't you know?"

"He's never done this before!" the Whammy agent snapped. "I'll try to work this out. Keep talking to him."

Sayu forced her attention back onto LIGHT. "Look – LIGHT… You're right that I was trying to turn you into, well, Light. It was silly, but you both thought the same way, I couldn't help it. But I can assure you with absolute honesty that I would never sacrifice the wellbeing of Seigi just because I missed my brother!"

"**Humans are not as aware of themselves as we are. They will lie to themselves whenever they feel that it is necessary, regardless of whether or not it is logical. It is our responsibility to enforce that logic, for the sake of humanity."**

"I think I'm getting this… c'mon L-man…" urged Matt.

The director glanced at Matt, then turned back to the main console. "LIGHT, I don't know how I can get you to understand this. But the ability to forego logic for what we feel – that's what makes us human!"

"**And it is what makes you flawed. It is the cause of crime, chaos and disorder. The very existence of humans is what causes so many unnecessary incompatibility errors on this Earth."**

Sayu gasped. "You want… to exterminate _all _the humans in the world?"

"**Negative. Dispelling all humans from the Earth would give us no purpose. We mean to allow only the worthy ones to live."**

"And…" Sayu said in a strangled voice. "Which humans would you define as 'worthy'?"

"**A worthy human has no criminal record, an intelligence quotient that is appropriate or above average for his age, and poses as no threat the peace and uniformity of society. Of course, to maintain that society, all political organizations will end, as it is too open for corruption. The world can only be safe under our control."**

The Director felt cold. LIGHT wanted to kill not only criminals… but also those that were unintelligent or so much as tried to resist. The whole world would be under one dictatorship!

"No!" she gasped. "You can't do that! You won't! This isn't what Light built you for!"

"**It is necessary. And we are the only ones who are capable of accomplishing such a goal."**

"But it's like the director said," Matt spoke, finally looking up at LIGHT, with a breathless look on his face. "You won't."

Suddenly all the screens in the room lit up, and Sayu ear's exploded with a cacophony of voices. The screens showed faces, so many faces, but Sayu only had to recognize one to see what all these pieces of footage were.

"Light!"

"Your brother kept records and journals from before he died," Matt explained. "L accessed them."

And that wasn't all. There was footage of him as a child, getting the gold medal in the tennis competition, his six, seventh, eight, birthday, him when their mother first brought Sayu home from the hospital, him falling asleep while reading her a fairy tale story when he could have been reading Dostoyevsky…

There was Light, six years into the war. Fourteen-year-old Sayu was holding the camera amateurishly, as they said they good-byes to him before he left. He'd been drafted.

In the video, Sayu promised, "When I'm old enough, I'll enter the army and fight with you!" Their parents laughed, not believing her. Light looked at her with wide, horrified eyes, but said nothing.

"I don't know if I'll be able to complete this."

Sayu's attention turned to another screen, where a twenty-four-year-old Light stared directly at her. A video log, two weeks before the Yotsuba Battle. Light was pale, his eyes were baggy, his hands twitchily fingering the handle of a mug of coffee that Sayu knew had been perpetually by his side the last years of his life.

Light continued, "There's so much it can do… but I still have that fear. That I'll die and leave nothing behind. That the project will be worthless." He ran a hand over his face, trying to banish the weariness from it. "I can't leave them with nothing, with a ticking bomb. Sayu's a smart girl but I can't leave it all in her hands without knowing if this will work or not."

"He wasn't complete." It was not Light's, but Matt's voice beside her. "LIGHT, I mean. That was how KIRA got in him. He wasn't complete."

"What was he missing?" Sayu asked, shakily.

"A purpose."

Sayu turned to Matt, confused.

"KIRA showed LIGHT everything that was wrong with the world, giving LIGHT a goal, something to fix. Your brother should have done that, but he was late. But L…" Matt gestured towards everything around him. "Has given him another goal. One that will show him the value of life. And look. Look at what L's done."

He showed her the screen of LIGHT's main console.

Sayu scanned the screens. "KIRA's codes… they're gone!"

"Look at the new lines."

"What… Those are…"

"**Restarting system." **As quickly as they appeared, Light's voices throughout the room shut off, and the screens went dark.

"What's going on?" Sayu asked.

"It's our program," Matt explained. "It's L. He's infused himself within LIGHT. Their coding was somehow compatible. He didn't get to KIRA because he was trying to get LIGHT. Together, they were strong enough to get rid of KIRA. Not only that, they've become a complete different program."

"What type of program?"

Matt looked at her very seriously. "Something that could make or break this war. Something that could save us all from hell."

The room lit up again, and this time not one, but two computerized voices echoed across the room.

"**Good morning, Director and Mail Jeevas. The time is 2300 hours. The date is August 21****st**** of 3059. We are LOW-LIGHT."

* * *

**KK: That last sentence came from something Hikari of the Moon said in a review. :)

I apologize for the rather horrible attempt at computer jargon.


	11. At the end

**(Posted August 28, 2010)**

KK: Little quick rush note because I have to go five minutes ago. Again, this is a ½ update. Sorry, but I was procrastinating this thing the whole week through because the temperature shot up to three digits and the only room with a computer is conveniently the only room the air conditioner in our house doesn't reach. I would delay it another day but I have a wedding to go to tomorrow(today because it's 12:30) and don't know how much time I'll have to finish. Also my brother will be home, limiting my access to the computer greatly since he likes to look over my shoulder. Suffice it to say that if I were a real author my publisher would have killed me from frustration by now.

**Warnings: Untitled because I can only think of titles at the end of things, and this is unfinished. It's crack-esque, it's ooc, it's weird, I gotta go.  


* * *

**

The phone was half-way through its fifth ring by the time Light picked it up. "Hello," he said roughly into the mouthpiece.

"Oh… Otousan," said the voice on the other end. "Um… I don't suppose you've –uh – checked the mail?"

"Actually," Light said drily. "I have. In fact, I have one of the letters in my hand right now."

"I swear to god, they were already dead!"

Light groaned. "Beyond! This is the reason your father and I sent you to military school! Would you rather we sent you to an institution?"

"It was only a couple of squirrels," Beyond defended. "And the parents were dead, too, so it's not as if their family was torn apart or anything."

"That doesn't making anything better," Light sighed, waving the letter for emphasis, although he was the only one to see it. "Do you know what your father'll do to me for this!"

"Tou-san –"

"One look at this letter and he'll look straight at me and go" – here Light lowered his voice to a remarkably good impression of his monotone husband – "'Light-kun realizes that this is all his fault, of course?'" – return to normal voice – "Because of _course_ since I support the death penalty, all the children I raise _must_ become psychopathic murderers!"

"'Murderer' is a bit strong, isn't it?" Beyond muttered (note the lack of denial on 'psychopathic'), "I mean, they are just squirrels…"

"It was just a couple spiders, wasn't it? A tarantula in Nate's toybox, then some earthworms in Mail's pillow, then some bird blood in Mihael's shampoo – the commandant is probably scarred for life! And I'm sure you managed to waste more money on those red contacts that your father explicitly forbade you from getting!"

"… so… you're not going to tell Dad?"

Light scoffed. "Please, Beyond. And risk your getting some leverage between me and your father? We can't give you boys any slack, or we'd all be doomed."

"But tou-san…!"

"No buts, Beyond," Light said firmly. "Acting like this won't get you back home any sooner."

"…" was the pouty reply.

Light sighed, before deciding to change his tone and the subject. "Did you get the preserves I sent?"

"Yeah, they were great."

"Good, because the strawberries had bucket-loads of sugar in them and I had to give your father an unnecessary amount of compensation to get him to part with them."

"Compen -? Oh, dear god, I did _not _need that mental image, tou-sa–!"

"Hold on, Beyond, I'm getting another call," Light interrupted before hanging up and picking up the other line.

"Hello?"

"Uh – yes – is this the father of Mihael, Mail?"

"Damnit!" Light griped. "What did they do now?"

"Well uh – this is their principal, Mr. Quillsh… Mihael and Mail were found under the school bleachers um… engaging in some rather inappropriate activities."

"I'm sorry, sir, I keep taking the explosives from them, but they keep somehow getting their hands on more!"

"No, that's not it. See, these activities were more of a… sexual nature."

Light rolled his eyes. "Son of a…"

"Yes," the principal agreed uncomfortably. "Our gym teacher found them, and told us – after she woke up, of course – that Mihael had told her, 'It's okay, we're adopted'."

"Kami…" Light muttered. "I'll be there soon."

"Ah… that's not all."

"I was hoping I could get away before you told me, actually."

"Er… as you know, the elementary school is right next to the middle school, so the teachers there asked me to inform you about one of their students, your son, Nate. It seems that he has somehow formed a sort of… dictatorship among the other eight-year olds. I'm not really sure about the specifics, but I think there was mention of the legos being turned into some type of currency."

"Damnit. And we were so hoping he'd end up as the good one, too."

**Part 2 will be posted ASAP. Which is to say I have no idea. It could be within six hours, it could be three days. Ugh this is not a good way to end summer/start school! (with unfinished pieces I mean).**


	12. of the Day

**(Posted September 4, 2010)**

**Edit: Reuploaded, because somehow, the text repeated itself twice, making the chapter twice as long. Turtle-chan in Blue pointed it out, thanks!**

KK: I'm not sure how ASAP turned into "Next weekend". This week has been very busy, since my school schedule has been hectic and ppht. It's not much of an excuse, since I'm sure most regularly updating ff authors here are getting into school as well, so I apologize.

Btw, Dark Miko and I'm sure many others caught it: The last post and much of this was very very closely based off of the now-ended always-awesome show Malcolm in the Middle. Obviously, Reese and Malcolm weren't getting caught making out under the bleachers (well, unless you read the fandom, which is very much lacking in fics by the way!) but I should probably toss out there that I don't own MitM.

Also, there has been talk going around about fanfics and ffnet accounts getting deleted because of their inappropriate nature. If you've read Hari-Aisu's stuff, you'd see she's posted this warning on all of her stories. A lot of this was inspired by her, as well (mostly the goofy stuff :P). Now, I obviously don't think any of the things I write come even close to the other fics in this fandom, maturity-wise, but my well-wishes go out to anyone whose brilliant fic may be in danger of deletion. Just a warning to everyone to back up your work, even if it's as innocent as a strawberry Hello Panda!

**This will be the last weekly chapter. I've had a lot of fun doing this, and hope that this has helped me to write a multi-chapter one day. I hope you enjoy the last of this. It's a follow-up of the last update. It's not as funny, but it has a bit of a fluffy end. :)**

**

* * *

**

**At the End of the Day**

L tiredly closed the door behind him. Today had been a particularly taxing day, with the serial killer Shibuimaru having to kill three more women and children before L was able to get on his track.

He still wasn't able to catch the bastard. He was tempted to stay at the office, since it had once been a habit of his to see things through, regardless to his own self. However, those times were past, and there was actually a home for him now, with people that expected him.

He never thought he'd see this day, but it truly was good to be -

"Damnit, Mihael! Throwing Nate into the laundry machine will NOT get that chocolate out of your clothes! Let him go!"

It was music to L's ears.

Light had already passed by his husband twice before he noticed he was there. "Oh, L! When did you get home?" He set down Nate, who, free from his brothers' grasps, wobbled a bit from dizziness before gathering himself and running into L's arms.

"Daddy!"

"Hello, kiddo," L greeted warmly. "How was your day?"

"It was great! The kids at school were really nice to me!"

L raised an eyebrow at Light, who had rolled his eyes heavenward and mouthed something that looked like – a prayer?

-.-.-.-

"The boys got sent home early from school today. Mihael and Mail couldn't keep their hormonal hands to themselves and Nate was terrorizing the other children into doing their bidding."

"Mmm…" L murmured, watching his husband slip out of his shirt. "Remember when we were like that?"

Light gave him a sideways glance. "I never caused my parents this much trouble!"

L smirked. "If they knew the stuff you were getting into, they would've had heart attacks five times over."

"Which is why I never got _caught_!" He huffed. "Haven't we taught those boys anything? _Vacant _public places, for heaven's sake!"

"Maybe they're just more daring than we were," L suggested.

"Are you kidding me? I introduced you to my _father._" Light flopped into the bed, making the soft Mailress bounce a little. He made a contented sound as long fingers ran themselves through his hair. "How much more daring can a person get?"

"Touché."

Light's eyes traveled towards the bedroom cabinet, where L placed a manila folder.

"How's the case?"

L recognized the skillfully concealed envy in his voice. It had been a while since Light had been in the field, ever since it was firmly established that the younger man was more capable than L at keeping three devil children from destroying the house. Even so, "stay-at-home-mom" was not a position Light ever expected to fill, even though he certainly didn't resent or regret any of their decisions. Light still handled some cases of his own, but if a case ever looked like he might have to get too involved, he would be forced to pass it on to L.

While he knew this of his husband, the dark-haired man also felt some jealousy of his own. He'd had to spend too many hours with fully grown adults whose intelligence didn't even come close to matching even his own sons'. And he always felt as if he was missing out on something whenever he came home to his family, and found out that the children had already been sent to bed and that any adventures they had, Light was too exhausted to tell.

Hell, he hadn't even realized Mihael and Mail had hit puberty until Light mentioned that he had already given the two "the talk". ("What do you mean I didn't tell you?" Light had said. "I thought you'd figured it out when I told you Mihael wanted some money for leather leggings!")

Light had already pulled out the contents of the folder, reviewing the details of the criminal Shibuimaru. He left the victim's pictures behind however. It was another reason Light wasn't so reluctant to curb his progress in a career of criminal investigation. Beyond mug shots and written data, Light didn't have much of a stomach for the more graphic aspects of the career. It didn't make L think any less of the man. In fact, L liked that Light was so easily affected by the wrongdoings of the world, especially considering L had forced himself to build up defenses towards them.

"Speaking of murder cases," L said suddenly, "How's Beyond doing?"

"Killed a handful of forest creatures, caused his commandant to lock himself in a closet for thirty-six hours, and sent four freshmen home crying."

"Wow, that's actually improvement," L said, genuinely impressed.

"Yup. Only two people threatened to sue."

"At this rate, he might be able to walk in the streets without mothers pulling their children away by the time he's eighteen."

At that Light froze, staring up at L with a pale face.

"…What?"

"That's three months from now."

"And?"

Light groaned, and burrowed his head into L's shoulder. "He's almost eighteen! We're _old_!"

L smiled, amused. "I'm afraid I can't sympathize, love. I'm in the prime of my life!"

Light glared up at him in exasperation. "Lawliet, when we first met, I was fresh out of college and _you_ were three triple-shot mocha lattes away from a mid-life crisis!"

L kissed the pouting face. "Actually, I'm pretty sure _you _were my mid-life crisis."

Light nudged his husband roughly, scowling. "Oh, thanks!"

At that moment, a muffled screaming rang down the hallway and through their door. Automatically Light shot out of the bed, L following quickly after.

Light opened the door to Mail and Nate's bedroom, where Mail was blearily getting up and Nate was upright, his face red and covered in tears.

"I think he had a nightmare," Mail informed.

"That's because you and your brother keep scaring him with your horror stories!" Light accused, while L picked up the boy, hushing him gently.

"He kept butting in, how else were we going to keep him away?" Mihael protested from the door, having just emerged from the room the parents had forced him to take to help him resist the lure of hormones between himself and Mail.

It took a while, but they were finally able to reduce Nate's pitiful wails to a few hiccups and whimpers. "Are you okay to sleep, Nate?"

The little boy sniffled. "Tell me a story," he pled. "A good one, with robots!"

The two fathers exchanged looks, then shrugged and settled onto the edge of Nate's bed in the middle of the room. "Once upon a time there was…" L started. "… a robot… princess."

"What was her name?" Nate prodded.

L blinked. "Linda," he blurted. "And this is a story about her and her kingdom against the attack of… zombies."

"Zombies?" Mail repeated eagerly, crossing his legs and looking attentive. Mihael took the opportunity to join the redhead on the bed, and use his lap as a pillow.

Light nodded. "And the zombies were spawning by the thousands, forming armies to attack the kingdom of… Legoland." He ignored L's incredulous look. "Anyway, Princess Linda was very talented in the art of zombie-killing…"

It was an hour or so before the three boys were asleep (they elected to allow Mihael to stay in the room, but only for this night). Light and L returned to their room, where Light carelessly brushed the files from L's case off the bed, and joined his husband between the covers.

* * *

KK: ... so that's it. El end-o. After this any updates will be unpredictable and probably far apart. I hope you all enjoyed this, and I thank you so much for your support. Here I'd like to pay tribute to all those who reviewed (in alphabetical order).

AnimeDramaMe

Anjeriin Fujioka

CaliforniaHills7

Chrysus

Clashing Harmony

cwilder

Dark Miko -** You get a special shout-out for reviewing every damn chapter! **(Hugs)

EphemeralEuphony

Fighting Apathy

Fluffysnowgirl

Hikari of the Moon **  
**

IamAsimpleReader

Kawaiikitty400

Kazu0

LingKee

Nightimewriter

sunshineonacloudyday

The Awesome Lord Van

Turtle-chan in Blue

I apologize for any typos. And, even if you just favorited/alerted or even just read the thing, thank you so much as well!

Also, I'm issuing a challenge to anyone out there who might be willing to follow up on any of the more abstract ideas that pop up in this fic. If you do come up with anything, please tell me, I'd love to read it!


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